Monk

Top Ten Quotes from USA Network's "MONK"

#10 - "I tried doing that once, making every minute count. Gave me a headache!"

#9 - "I have no problem with change. I just don't like to be there when it happens."

#8 - "That officer outside told me I was dead. I'm not dead! Am I?"

#7 -

Monk: "I can't go to Mexico!"

Sharona: "Why not?"

Monk: "It's not here!"

#6 - “Nature! I've got Nature on my hand! Get it off!”

#5 -

Sharona Fleming: That man took a whizz in the subway. That man killed four people in cold blood. Now who do you think we should arrest?

[long pause]

Adrian Monk: [mumbling] The murderer.

#4 -

[Monk is babysitting a two-year old]

Treesa Crane: Now before I go, do you have any questions for me?

Adrian Monk: Yes, yes, I have a couple of questions. What does he eat?

Treesa Crane: He... eats food. He eats whatever you eat, only in smaller portions.

Adrian Monk: Oh. So he's like a person

#3 -

Capt. Stottlemeyer: Monk, are you absolutely sure about this? And don't give me any of that 95 percent crap!

Adrian Monk: Captain, I am 100 percent sure that she *probably* killed him.

Capt. Stottlemeyer: What does that mean?

Adrian Monk: [waits a moment] 95 percent

#2 -

[Monk jumps onto a table to avoid a snake]

Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: I thought you were afraid of heights.

Adrian Monk: Snakes trump heights. It goes germs, needles, milk, death, snakes, mushrooms, heights, crowds, elevators...

Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Okay, okay, I don't need the entire list.

#1 -

Monk: "Maybe I should go talk to that student over there that the bullies are picking on." Sharona: "Oh, I don't know -- what would you say?"

Monk: "That things will get worse."